Beetroot-Loving Watson Takes a Hammering

Awakened by the hammering coming from his neighbor’s garden, Nick Watson is up early and thinking that he might have finally found a use for the 24 jars of beetroot that the Chairman bestowed on him as his Secret Santa Christmas present two years ago. Poised with a six-pack of the red toxin in hand, Watson pads out the front door in his rubber-soled shoes and onto the front path ready for action. But it’s not the sound of the unknown hammering – no, this is not a reference to the Sanjiv Sachdev and Matthew White “Prediction of the Week” (Wolves 1 Arsenal 4 – a hammering we can surely all enjoy!) that startles our disgruntled early riser, it’s the sight of the Moonerazzi staring up at him from the front pages of The Sun, The Guardian and The International Herald Tribune all lying on his driveway.

Yes, reading is elementary to our dear Watson, but the Moonerazzi, with her green Marge Simpson hairdo all askew and her Amy Winehouse tribute tattoos revealed in all their unlikely glory, is enough to shake even the most well read of predictors. To say the least, Week 13 in the Predictorship was unlucky for some but none more so than the scribbling scourge of founding predictor Mark Young. But even as she was being hauled away to rehab, the Blackburn Rover’s last words were directed at the New York-based Englishman: “I’m still ahead of you in the table.”

Sadly, most people are this season. None more so than Janet Roberts, who continues to set the Predictorship pace. Two points back of the Chairman’s missus is Steven Dunlop, who earned quote of the week honors with this unique Valentine to the table-topper: “I’m rather chuffed at my proximity to your wife – in the purely platonic Predictorship sense of course!” Of course, Mr. Dunlop is not the only predictor making moves on Ms. Roberts. Various members of the Roberts and Taylor clans are all getting into Top 10 positions, girding themselves for the Home Counties version of the Hatfields and the McCoys.

The big move this week comes from Christine Butters with an 8-point top score windfall. By coincidence, 8 people also correctly predicted that Chelsea would beat Manchester United 1-0 (Lady Butters being one of them). And finally, a tip of the forelock (yes, some of us still have them) to David Jones, Matthew White and Alex Iskander Liew, who all record season high positions.

Even more importantly, a get well soon shout out to our rehab-bound poisoned-pen princess. As the Leeds United players never said of Brian Clough: “We’ll miss you while you’re gone.”